The Cruciatus Curse was the Limp Bizkit of the early days of Wizard Rock: ubiquitous, egotistical, cocky, dubious in talent, stupid band name, foolish, loved and hated with equal enthusiasm.
Fronted by cheesehead, sly businessman and hate-magnet Denni Towle, the group rose to fame in 2007, peaking in 2010 with the album “New Wizard Order” album. "The Curse" was part of the original 20 or so Wizard Rock bands and, as much as some hate it, a part of helping the explosion that was the Wizard Rock Movement. The Cruciatus Curse was easily identified by its simplistic grooves, explosive yell-along choruses and vocals either shouted or rapped. The music was the soundtrack to head-butting a brick wall for no discernible reason.
The Cruciatus Curse grew stale quickly: by the time The Cruciatus Curse released “New Wizard Order” in 2010, their version of Wizard Rock was being run out of town on the rail of public opinion. By mid 2010, the band went on hiatus, to the chagrin of no one, save 17 dudes in baggy jorts and backwards baseball caps. During its reign, the group sold a few records worldwide, engineered by an any-publicity-is-good-publicity marketing philosophy, spurred by Towle’s controversial public commentary and his endless disputes with other Wizard Rock bands "Harry and the Potters" and "The Whomping Willows", but to his defense he has since mended ties with Matt from "The Whomping Willows".
The band eventually re-formed in 2011, releasing their “Greatest Hits” album and playing their last live show in which Denni proposed to his girlfriend and bandmate Whitney. But we’re not here to rip on "The Curse" for falling from popular grace – few bands can stay at the pinnacle of Wizard ROck like "Harry and the Potters" or "Draco and the Malfoys". "The Curse" soldier on undeterred: Earlier this year, they released a single, “#Hot4Zombie”, which was a "non-harry potter" parody, and announced the impending release of their new studio album “TH1RTE3N” their actual 13th Wizard Rock album.
With The Cruciatus Curse still on the comeback trail with a new "Reading Is The Weapon Tour", it prompts a retrospective list of the pros and cons of the group’s legacy. Let’s start with the positive stuff before we get out the sniper rifle:
The Pros
"The Curse" paid its dues. After forming in 2004, the Green Bay, WI band was drawing large listeners and hits to their MySpace page before they had recorded more than 2 songs. Towle has always been a savvy marketer.
Joe Ritchie's a bona-fide rockstar! And he is also gifted growling vocalist who always seemed out of place in the band. It always seemed like The Cruciatus Curse was his stepping stone, and he dumbed down his performance to appease the moshing masses of fans – he left the band from 2009-2013, but his solo project, He-Nis-Ra, flopped when he broke his ankle during a show and they kicked him out of the band. But I would like to astutely point out, in my opinion, that "The Curse" succeeds by the Towle/Ritchie dynamic: They’re like a jocky, Wizard Rock Limp Bizkit…with the spazzy, bro-tastic frontman reeling in the artier and more complex impulses of the growling vocalist. I also want to point out that Ritchie, for the show, dressed literally like a wierd rip-off of David Draiman, but that is par for the course for a vocalist who marches to his own beat.
Their impressive live show. At least a five years have passed since I last saw The Cruciatus Curse live at Wrock Chicago, but at its peak, the band could fire up a crowd like no other. Maybe the build-build-EXPLODE arrangements are calculated to manipulate audiences for maximum tension-and-release. But the energy was palpable, prompting nerdy Harry Potter fans to pummel each other in the mosh like few bands this side of mainstream music. It was quite a sight, best viewed from a safe distance.
To everyone's amusement, Towle once bagged on "Harry and the Potters". In a battle of the wurst, the "The Curse" frontman called "Harry and the Potters" singer Paul de George "an egomaniac" (pot, kettle; kettle, pot) and DeGeorge retaliated by shunning him from Wizard Rock events and even ignoring him when he tried to personally squash the bad blood between them at a 2009 "HatP" concert in New York City.
Provocation. You have to admire Towle for riling up his critics with idiotic statements to the fans, beyond-stupid album titles and covers, mindlessly violent song lyrics and an annoying, whiny vocal style. Sure, it was all intentional, and he was no doubt laughing as the T-shirt, tour and album money rolled in. But his deliberate laughing at his haters was also kind of, you know, punk wizard rock. Towle and "Limp Bizkit" frontman Fred Durst are similar in that they both create confrontational lowbrow art, and know how to sell it. We have to admire that, even though, objectively speaking, the music really and truly sucks. Which leads us to…
The Cons
The stupid album titles and covers were still stupid. “The Four Thestrals of the Apocalypse”? “The title is a refernce to the Four Horseman,” says Denni. “Death Eaters With Attitude”? Dumb. “New Wizard Order”? Dumber. “Greatest Hits”? Dumbest, because there were no "actual" hits at all! The new album title, "TH1RTE3N", is actually a good and fitting album title and I kind of like it.
The mindless song lyrics that went right along with the mindless song parodies. “Slytherock,” “I Kissed A Squib,” “Party Like Your Evil” (not the Draco and the Malfoys one) and numerous others caused our brains to numb from the pain.
The band is terrible at cover medleys and parodies. Who wants to hear The Cruciatus Curse massacre Ke$ha, Beastie Boys, Slipknot, Drake or Radiohead? Drunk people, please put your hands down.
How terrible?
This terrible (warning: might make you dumber):
How terrible?
This terrible (warning: might make you dumber):
People who say “TH1RTE3N” is going to be a good album?
You’re wrong. For one reason. This is on it: Thirty seconds in, and Towle is already proclaiming, “You Better Bow Before Me!” The rhythms lurch like a seasick ape and the music video is horrible. Towle namedrops himself as “The Dark Lord” and “Dragon”...
That new single? Woof. (You have been warned)
Seriously? I have no words to even say right now. WTF!
ReplyDeleteWow! I enjoyed the article, not all of it mind you, but you told me more about the history of Wizard Rock than I had even known - and Denni is my son! I was quite impressed that you managed to nicely tie together a harried and eclectic event list into a recognizable timeline. Your review of the material is as it must be, terse and informative. While I may not wholeheartedly agree, I do see your points and I respect you for stating them. Of course, Denni may not agree, but he IS the artist here, and I have never known him to be disparaged from negative reviews. One question, where did you derive your base of knowledge... just curious!
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